Monday, July 23, 2012

a bad, very bad, day...

so. 
i typically feel like most days of my life are pretty darn good.
really good.
we're healthy, happy, loved, 
fed, clothed, warmed by heat,
cooled by a/c...
we have it pretty good.

but, today. today was not good.
i mean, it actually ended up good.
it just started out not good and stayed not good for awhile.

i learned, make that re-learned, procrastination
can sometimes bite you... but yet, i still procrastinate...
i also learned, sometimes things are just a roll of the dice...
again, i guess i just re-learned that...

so, ride with me as we leave my driveway this morning at about 8:30 or so.
i thought, real quick-like i would go get 
my now expired drivers license renewed,
before the 60 day 'grace' period was up. 
in two days.

to back track a bit... sometime in the later spring i noticed
that my drivers license was going to expire on may 25.
about 20 days or so prior to me giving birth.
this means i was roughly nine months preggo when this 
realization came to me.
who wants to go get a picture made, 
that will be with you for four years,
when they are nine months pregnant?
i would not.
so, i procrastinated.
it was hot, i was ginormo preggy
and i was not up for the task of drivers license renewal.
so, it kept getting pushed off of the to-do list.
often.

this brings us to the present.
i still procrastinated. renewal was penciled in on my calendar 
all last week... finally on monday's space in my calendar
it said, 'very last day to renew drivers license'
so i took heed of what my self was telling me.

i asked mike if he could please just work around my need
for his help with the boys this lovely monday morning.
who would have ever thought that more than half of the day
would be exhausted exhausting me of any bit of sanity i thought i had?

how is it that today i ran into every single 
government employee who could be difficult?
i mean all. in. the. same. day.
there was no going from one snarly person
to a bright shiny person.
nope. 
the bright shiny people were reserved for everyone ELSE.
not me. not today.

i got all the i-dotters and t-crossers.
in fact, i probably make some 'gray area'-ers
INTO 
i-dotters and t-crossers.
i really think i did.

so.... where is the rest of my story you ask?
here. 
here goes.
keep in mind, i am typing with a stabbing
head ache and eyes so entirely sore that i am certain
i will wake up in the morning with puff balls for eyes...
why? you ask?
because.... of those i-dotters and t-crossers i tell you!

8:30-ish... i stroll into the not too crowded dmv
i am greeted by a generally friendly looking
and sounding female in the lobby of the dmv.
after spinning around in a circle trying to figure out
where exactly i am to go, i find i am to 'check-in' 
with this generally friendly looking dmv worker.
after showing her my license and telling her 
i was in for a dl renewal,
she asks, "do you have in contacts?"
to which i reply, "no, i had lasik surgery"
to which she replies, "do you have that card they gave you?" 
to which i reply, "card? um, no."
so i pass "go" and get a number and go sit to wait my turn.

as i start to speak to dmv worker #2, 
i remember thinking, 
"man, i wish the lady next to her had called my number"
she had been more "smiley" to her previous 'customers'
and i wanted a smiley, happy dmv worker...
o well.
so we chat for moment 
and the whole eye 'card' thing comes up again... 
and stalls the renewal process dead in its tracks.
dead. in. its. tracks.
why?
because i don't have the card and now i am being told i have to get
an eye exam completed in the next two days.
no big deal. i just have two small kids at home.
i can either ask my husband not to work
or just drag them all over creation, because let's face it,
why wouldn't that be a barrel of fun??????
so, i leave.
i decide that having a 'card' sounds familiar and i want to go
check into that in my trusty 'lasik' file folder at home.
once i get home and inspect the folder
i don't find it.
but, while the folder let me down, my purse didn't!
yes, the same purse i had with me at the dmv.
the one that had the card in my 'card' case.
yup.
i guess since four years have passed i just didn't 
recall that i had one, much less where the heck it was...

so, back to the dmv.
the lobby desk worker deems card acceptable.
the dvm worker #2 chooses to zero in on 
one. single. word. on the card 
stating that laser vision correction MAY change your vision
well duh.
but since it didn't say it WOULD change your vision,
"teresa t-crosser" decided she needed to check 
validity with her supervisor.
thank goodness this supervisor had half of a brain.
she deemed that if i could pass the eye exam, 
it was good enough.
praise jesus, i thought.
so... i pass the eye exam.
YAHOO!
now we're getting somewhere nowhere.
through the process of renewal,
"teresa t-crosser" says that 
my name and social security number do not match.
i cry.
i just cried.
i cried because i could tell that i was on the path of a loooooooong day.
i was at the mercy of "inga i-crosser and teresa t-crosser"
and they were out in full force today.
so, i pull myself together. somewhat.
and leave in a civil manner.
then i call poor mikey
and he got an earful like he's never gotten before from me,
close, but probably in the top two or three
"all hell has broken loose" moments of our lifetime.
{keep in mind, i don't hold back too often either, 
so this was bad}
i was so not happy. not. happy.
why did i leave the dmv?
to go to the house to get my certified marriage license
so i can then go to the social security office,
DUH.
so... i learn where the ss office is in our town
and head on out...
find a place to park. walk. and walk.
go through security- airport style.
and finally arrive at the ss office 
and take yet another number.

finally when my number is called 
and i find  "window 7"
i feel like i am making headway
in my unraveling day.
but, no.
no headway.
just head ache.

why, you ask????
because in order to change your name officially on your ss card,
you must have valid identification.
my drivers license {aka valid identification} was expired.
they don't do 'grace' at the ss office.

so after meeting window worker #7's supervisor
i leave to go to my doctors office!!!!!!!!!!!!
why?????????? you ask, why????????
what's wrong with you people?????????
so they could give me proof that i truly, really and truly,
exist on this god-forsaken planet.
i do not kid.
i had to go to my doctor and request them 
to give me a page of my 'internal medical records' with 
my name and date of birth on there to prove i am me.
i. am. dying. a. slow. death. by. now.

i return to the ss office thinking i have found a sweet close
parking spot only to find that the sidewalk is closed off for repairs
and i have to walk allllllllllllllll the way around the enormous
GREEN SPACE
they have made in front of the new court house.
god, help me.
please.

i return to take yet another number in a MUCH busier
ss office. at lunch time.
i meet another lovely ss worker at window #3.
the documents i got from my doctor...
are. not. certified.
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
i asked for the supervisor, ...again.
she jets off and comes back a few minutes later.
apparently, they were going to "let me slide"
holy mother of god, take my hand.
i pray.
if i didn't have faith and prayer,
ugh. i will refrain from any tasteless referral to causing mass chaos
because it is not funny, or ok to joke, 
but i do not kid. i was not mentally ok at this point. 
i had checked out.

so, then, what to scrutinize now??????
because it couldn't be ok to just have the medical records
be enough and i move on with getting my married
name on my ss card after eleven YEARS.

nope. window worker #3
actually held my certified marriage license two inches 
from her beady little eyes and asked me if my name was 
BUNNETT.
she was angling towards the fact that my name as written
on my certified marriage license was possibly misspelled.
O. NO. WINDOW. WORKER. #3.
not today, you're not...
you are not taking was small amount of sanity
and brain matter i have left in my head and telling me
that a 'mis-spell' on my CERTIFIED. MARRIAGE. LICENSE.
was going to cause me an issue.
i took a pen, stood up from my seat, 
leaned WELL into window worker #3s work window
and DISTINCTLY pointed out that 
what she was certain was an errant N
was in fact a fully formed, albeit fancy!, cursive R.
problem solved, window worker #3.

she probably doesn't want to know how close 
to calamity she came. no way. no how.

so, in completion of changing my name,
she informed me that it would not "take effect" 
in "the system" until tomorrow
and that the dmv probably would not recognize it 
until tomorrow.
o contrere.
but, i smiled and left.
and walked alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the way back 
around the lovely green space to my car.
to go back to the dmv. again.
for the third time, TODAY.

my third and final visit to the dmv
resulted in my actually getting my license renewed.
and when the first picture i took had 
some crazy fly-away going on with my hair,
she actually asked if i would like to re-take the picture...
that was nice.
and so finally, at about 2pm, i had completed the task.
no biggie.


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